Day 132 & 133: The Week I Became a Frozen Zombie Pancake
- Nov 26
- 4 min read
Tuesday - Day 132: The Jab Freeze & Pancake Apocalypse
Worked from home. Normally that means luxury - a casual 7am wake up, soft housecoat, warm slippers, angelic soundtrack of purring cats.
But no.
My body said absolutely not and woke me at 5am like I had a train to catch to the Arctic. I laid there blinking at the ceiling wondering why my brain still thinks I’m on commuter duty even when there’s no need.
Trauma.
Pure trauma.
The cats, strangely, were SILENT.
No 5am opera.
No Molly singing the songs of her people.
No Ruby doing her morning TED Talk.
Have they cancelled their podcast early for Christmas?
Have they unionised?
Are they plotting something?
I’ll update if I see weapons.
Speaking of Molly - my sweet baby has snots.
Like full on tiny tuba nose.
She’s now on antibiotics ahead of her teeth surgery and honestly she looks adorable but devastating, like a Victorian orphan who just wants soup.
I want to wrap her in a blanket burrito and feed her tiny grapes.
Boyfriend left for work.
I made coffee like a goddess reborn and logged on.
I was supposed to go to the office, but vet duty called… and cats > capitalism.
BREAKFAST & LUNCH ADVENTURES
I decided to go wild - two protein pancakes, GINGER yoghurt, maple syrup.
Yes, ginger.
Who do I think I am?
It was divine.
A small Michelin moment.
Lunch was Freya chicken broth with veg + rice noodles, warm and comforting, like a hug - UNTIL sudden nausea washed over me as if my stomach realised we were on Mounjaro and said, “Too much liquid?? RETCH.”
Honestly one day I’m going to eject my organs.
Gastroparesis is my Roman Empire.
THE MOUNJARO FREEZE & WORK LIFE
I spent lots of time researching the Mounjaro Freeze™ because internal AND external cold is turning me into Olaf.
Key facts learned (and screamed into the void):
• You feel cold because you’re losing insulation (I miss my internal duvet).
• Metabolism slows so your body says power saving mode: ON.
• Hormones = chaos.
• Less food = less heat, congratulations you’re now a fridge magnet.
So yes - the shivering, the gloves indoors, the icicle toes… all normal.
We are all here, trembling together like wet squirrels.
Beautiful community.
Work was work - emails, Teams calls, pretending to nod thoughtfully while actually Googling “electric heated hands for humans.”
EVENING ENTERTAINMENT: MASTER CHEF & THE BEAST IN ME
Dinner?
No.
Appetite?
Ghosted.
So we watched MasterChef, then the final episode of The Beast in Me - and WOW.
The ending chilled me more than Mounjaro ever could and that’s saying something.
Nina’s reaction to her baby crying - does she fear the child might inherit Nile’s evil?
Is she scared of herself too?
The symbolism… the tension… my hair stood up like I was being electrocuted by Ikea lighting.
Then bed!!
Heating on.
Blanket.
Duvet.
Cat.
Praying for warmth that never came.
Thank god Wednesday = official WFH day.
Wednesday - Day 133: Cold-Blooded Creature
Woke up at 6… then crawled back under the duvet until 7 because I was partially frozen. I swear I could hear crack crack crack as I turned like a human ice pop.
I truly think I now have ice in my veins.
So am I… Bella Cullen?
Edward?
A hybrid?
Dead?
Zombie?
Who even am I anymore.
Work?
Same circus, different clowns.
Meetings.
Emails.
The slow pre-Xmas wind down where half the office is pretending to work while secretly shopping for gifts their partners won’t like.
Breakfast + lunch: exact repeat of Tuesday.
Pancakes. Bone broth.
Because LOOK AT ME - living life like a daredevil.
Adventurous Queen.
Honestly food tastes like cardboard at the moment.
If I had wallpaper, it would be on the menu.
Dinner à la Dulux.
Afternoon involved presentations and mental decline.
My brain was not braining.
It was buffering like old YouTube.
AFTER WORK - I CLAIMED THE SOFA LIKE A KINGDOM
Finished the day, grabbed a blanket from upstairs like a hunter retrieving prey, draped myself dramatically on the sofa and poured myself a rum for warmth.
Did I deserve it?
Absolutely.
For surviving the day.
And for having blood that is now 60% ice water.
Tomorrow is WEEK 19 WEIGH-IN.
WHERE HAS TIME GONE?
Scales better behave.
Jab on Friday - the day before my Poland flight - so I’ll probably sleep the entire plane journey like a tranquilised sloth.
Staying on 10mg for one more month, then tapering off slowly - meaning around four more months of jab life.
Spring freedom incoming unless I melt first.
STRANGER THINGS EXCITEMENT - I’M SHAKING
STRANGER THINGS FINAL SEASON DROPS TOMORROW.
I am shaking.
Vibrating.
Shedding my mortal form.
Literally vibrating in a way that might crack glass.
For the uninitiated (how dare you) - Stranger Things is a masterpiece of:
80s nostalgia - synths, mullets, neon leg warmers, Dungeons & Dragons references everywhere
Supernatural chaos - Demogorgons, Mind Flayer, Upside Down drama
Friendship + trauma - kids, teens, and grown-ups who basically live in Hawkins and are experts at screaming, running, and surviving impossible odds
Monsters, labs, portals - scientists with bad ideas, government menacing energy, portals that ruin everyone’s week
Eleven - telekinetic badass, angst queen, haircuts to die for, punching baddies into walls
Emotional trauma packaged in nostalgia, pop culture references, and heart-warming moments of pure chaos
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