Week 14 Weigh-in - dose 7.5mg

Week 14: Plateau? I Hardly Know Her!

Gather round, my darling Jabbers, for it is I - your ever-hopeful, ever-hungry heroine - reporting live from the Mounjaro rollercoaster, week 14 edition.

And what a thrilling ride it’s been… except the ride seems to have stopped.

On the same spot.

For two.

Whole.

Weeks.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the scales and I are currently locked in a passive-aggressive staring contest. Every morning, I approach with optimism and perhaps a touch of delusion, whispering encouraging words like “be kind” and “you can do it.”

And every morning, the scale replies, coldly:

“No change.”

It’s official - I’ve plateaued.

Twice in a row.

A double-decker of disappointment.

I mean, how can one not lose weight when one’s diet consists mainly of protein yogurt, caffeine, and regret?

I’ve even turned down cake.

Cake, people!

Me!

The same woman who, pre-Mounjaro, would have fought off a raccoon for a slice of Victoria sponge.

But here I am, 14 weeks deep, one stone left to lose, and the scales have decided to gaslight me.

I suspect foul play.

Possibly sodium.

Or maybe the universe just enjoys testing my patience.

Now, the food noise.

Oh yes.

That insidious whisper has started creeping back in like a dodgy ex who texts, “Hey stranger.”

I’ll be minding my own business, and suddenly my brain goes,

“Remember toast? Warm, buttery toast?”

And before I know it, I’m inhaling the smell of someone else’s sandwich like a bloodhound at a picnic.

This, my friends, is why I’ve reluctantly made the executive decision to move from 7.5mg to 10mg in 2 weeks.

I didn’t want to - I was hoping 7.5 would be my forever home.

A calm, quiet little cul-de-sac of appetite suppression.

But no.

The food noise has breached the fence, and it’s time to call in the heavy artillery.

So yes - two more jabs of 7.5, then onwards to 10.

Do I feel slightly terrified? Absolutely.

Do I also feel hopeful that this will finally shift the last stubborn stone before Christmas? Also yes.

Because let’s be honest, I’m not spending December pretending a mince pie doesn’t exist.

I’ve come too far to be the woman who “just has a satsuma” while everyone else is face-first in pigs in blankets.

No, no.

I want to be the woman who walks into Christmas feeling fabulous - slightly smug, very sparkly, and maybe one stone lighter.

So here’s to week 14: the week of no losses but much determination.

To the silent battle between scales and sanity.

To the creeping food noise and the courage to say, “Not today, toast!”

And to the brave souls stepping up to 10mg, armed with protein shakes, sparkling water, and pure stubborn will.

The case of the Stubborn Stone continues, my dear Jabbers - but rest assured, JABatha Christie is on the case.

Stay tuned for week 15: The Dose Awakens.

With Love,

JABatha Christie your resident weight-loss detective and part-time carb enthusiast.